


Faith

by VenusGuided



Category: Silent Trilogy - Sues Cummings
Genre: F/F, M/M, and it's all in tribute and love and celebration of ya girl antoasty, i'm finally posting a ffx s3 crossover au, this is it
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-21
Updated: 2018-07-21
Packaged: 2018-12-05 01:03:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,445
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11567082
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VenusGuided/pseuds/VenusGuided
Summary: Crow is frustrated to find out his little brother Lao has signed up for a death mission. Determined to sabotage it, he tags along while their other brother Nova tries to sabotage from afar. Unfortunately Lao is a very stubborn little martyr/princess, and even more so after they find a man who claims to be from a thousand years in the past.And if it wasn't already obvious: it's FFX.





	1. do you REALLY have to be this way lao????

**Author's Note:**

  * For [bigtoasty](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bigtoasty/gifts).



> i don't even know what to say???
> 
> happy birthday to my dear ffx pal antonia antoasty, who is a hero and my angle... or my demyon. i hope this is a good tribute to our palship & what a wonderful friend you are who i love and adore
> 
> i wish i'd gotten more of this done before your birth but unfortunately as we all know, jobs :')
> 
> this will probably be a little difficult to follow for anyone out there who doesn't know ffx, but maybe not? i have no idea honestly i'm not even trying to write this with broader appeal than to me and ya girl antoasty i'm so sorry
> 
> IMPORTANTLY THOUGH: this will not contain silent trilogy spoilers!!!!! it's too ffx for that. i mean, okay, you get a bit of a sense of kez and luna's personalities/interaction with lao, but that's not really spoilers because the context is completely different and always a big deal SO
> 
> i hope you like it birth toast xoxoxoxoxo

The moment Lao’s mother talked him into throwing his life away on Summoning, Crow was outie. Well, okay, he’d done a fair bit of shouting before storming off, but the point was he was leaving Bevelle in protest. Not just the palace, not just the inner sanctum, the entire city.

He didn’t make it further than Macalania before Nova caught up to him.

“Don’t you dare,” Crow said, throwing Nova’s hand from his shoulder. “Don’t tell me it’s Lao’s choice, don’t try to stop me from stopping him!”

“Wasn’t gonna,” Nova replied. “I was just gonna suggest you be more strategic about it.”

Crow stared at him levelly.

Nova raised an eyebrow.Or maybe both. It was hard to tell sometimes, what with the hair strategically covering his Al Bhed-green eye. “Ya really think Amaya’s gonna let me be anywhere near her precious baby’s guardianship?”

“Lao will want —”

“Do you really think that matters?” Nova asked. “He’s already agreed to this. Which means he’s already talked himself into buying that it’s his ‘duty’.”

Crow would’ve punched one of the crystal-trees, if that wouldn’t piss off the seriously malicious wood spirits. “So what? We march him to his death?”

“You’re jyji, on your way to becoming a maester if they have their way,” Nova shamed him. “They’ll be begging you to be his Guardian. And at least one of us will have to keep an eye on him.”

“And?” Crow said. “Why can’t it be you?”

“I just said?”

“I know! But I don’t care, and Lao won’t either, so!”

Nova rolled his eyes. “With how much Pixie pities me, I’m not exactly gonna be a prime candidate for changing his mind.” He flicked back his hair as he said, “But I’m definitely a prime candidate for talking the Al Bhed into giving him their protection, whether he wants it or not.”

There wasn’t any denying that. “I still don’t want to.”

Nova shrugged. “Pixie can go die then.”

“I will,” Crow said, “but I’m going to be seriously pissed off about it for the rest of our lives.”

“We can keep in contact,” Nova said. “We’ll collaborate on sabotaging him. Shouldn't be hard to keep in touch, what with Rin running all the travel agencies, and, well. Machina.”

“You're such a heathen,” Crow said, finally finding something to smile about.

“Go back,” Nova said. “I’ll keep going. Get set up with the Al Bhed and all.”

Crow reluctantly turned back.

They’d find a way. They had to.

*

From the moment they met, it was obvious Lao had the talent. Pyreflies were drawn to him, and he could Send them on their way with a flick of his eight-year-old wrist. White Magic drew little of his energy, especially when used to shield. It was pretty widely noticed, but Crow had always assumed his mother would rather keep her only child alive. So had most people.

Maybe that was why Amaya talked him into it.

“I don’t want to talk about it with you,” Lao said when Crow climbed in through his window. Lao’s room was high up in the political palace, near the Grand Maester’s room, but a small room heavily decorated in scripture scrolls and Besaidian woven blankets. “Why are you here, if I’m ‘selfishly throwing [my] life away’?”

“I might’ve said some things out of anger,” Crow replied.

Lao glared at him. “You stopped five seconds before calling my mother a bitch.”

“I might’ve almost said some things out of anger, too,” Crow said. “What do you want me to say? ‘Yes, Lao, have fun on your death march’?”

“You could be more supportive,” Lao said. “I have to at least try.”

“You don’t, though,” Crow replied. “I know you’re going to anyway. I don’t wanna see you die, and you’re way too young to be signing up for this, but fine.”

“I’m seventeen, I’m not a baby,” Lao replied. “And if it’s not me, it’ll be someone else. Nothing’s going to change if we stay here.”

_ That _ got Crow interested. “What do you think you’ll be able to find? To change things?”

“I don’t know,” Lao replied. “I don’t know if we’ll be able to. I want to try and find something else along the way, and if we don’t, I’m pretty confident I’ve got a long Calm in me.”

Crow sighed. Just pure optimism, as usual. “The last Calm only lasted six months.”

“I know that,” Lao replied. “Six months is better than nothing.”

“You’re worth more than six months,” Crow said. Then, because it might not actually sink in with Lao otherwise: “My mother was worth more than six months.”

Lao’s glare disappeared. He leant forward, touching Crow’s arm. “I know that, too.”

Crow stepped out of reach.

“Will you be my guardian or not?”

Crow sighed again. “Yeah, Lao, you know I will.”

“Good,” Lao said. “Do you think we can convince Nova?”

“No way.”

Lao rolled his eyes, like Nova was the selfish one. He didn’t even realise how much he was asking, the little shit.

“I don’t know how long my apprenticeship will be,” Lao said. “But you will… you’ll stay with me, won’t you?”

Even though it was the last thing in the world he wanted to do at that point in time, Crow hugged Lao. “Of course I will.”

Lao was simple, and bad at seeing the long-term picture. Not the bigger picture, he was painfully good at that one, but predicting how things could progress a few years down the line wasn’t a factor in Lao’s decisions. He saw people hurting and decided, “I’m going to do something”, even if that something was effectively holding a bandage to a wound and declaring, “There! Fixed!”

Crow didn’t have the luxury of being so short-sighted. He wasn’t nearly cute enough to be forgiven for it, for one, and for another, he couldn’t even think like that, so of course he was blindsided by Lao suddenly deciding to be a Summoner where Nova was not even a little surprised.

Lao’s apprenticeship started immediately. Amaya swept around the palace and the temple beaming with pride, and Lao ate it up like ‘yes, this is normal, what kind of mother isn’t only proud of her sweet kind human rights activist healer child when he’s running off to die’. With Nova gone, Crow took to hovering around Carmen in small rooms around the temple.

“Don’t you have a job to do?” she asked.

“We’re not all slaves to Yevon,” Crow replied.

“Gabriel isn’t going to be happy if he finds you hanging around here,” Carmen said. “Can’t you go cope with Lao’s impending death somewhere else?”

“Don’t you  _ care _ ?” Crow demanded.

Carmen shrugged. “Summoners die, Sin comes back. It’s all part of the spiral of repentance.”

“Amen,” Crow dryly replied. “I’ll help you with your nun-chores.”

“Today I’m healing,” Carmen replied, eyebrows raised. “You can do that now?”

Crow had always been strictly a Black Mage, and she knew it. Their mother had taught them both Black Magic, then Carmen had turned out able to manage the healing side of White Magic. She couldn’t create the shields, or block spells, but basic healing.

“I can help with dressing for their injuries and Potions,” Crow replied. “Why are you such an asshole nun?”

“Comes with the territory,” Carmen replied.

It wasn’t exactly that Carmen was an asshole so much as she found the majority of people in their lives exhausting. Especially after their parents died. Crow understood, but was actually capable of letting people touch his heart, so, you know. 

Bevelle suited Carmen, especially the temple/palace. While most temples around Spira were small, Bevelle’s was a twisting labyrinth of secrets bathed in the light of poorly distributed candles. The walls were painted with scripture and glyphs, some of it so ancient nobody knew how to decipher it. It was said that a thousand years ago, when Sin was born, it destroyed Bevelle completely. Only parts of the temple remained, from which the city was rebuilt, but they could never recover all the lost knowledge.

Crow just wished they hadn’t rebuilt it out of stone. Walking into the temple depths was highly unpleasant unless he wore a jacket, and the world deserved to see his guns, temple or no.

Over the years since coming to Bevelle, Crow had tried to explore a lot of the catacombs. It didn’t really work out; warrior monks were everywhere. He met Nova that way. Leon was a creep as always, and he’d dragged Nova to the palace from Yevon-knows-where to be more cannon fodder. He’d tried finding a good place to spy on Maester meetings, or Leon, just something, and had found Nova already there.

Since then, they’d always been partners in crime. And being without Nova, well. It was a bizarre kind of loneliness that made him actually want Lao to hurry up and become a full Summoner already.

Then it was two months later, and Lao had two days left to name his guardians so he could enter the Chamber of the Fayth, and oh, no, Crow didn’t want any of this, actually. It was all really happening, and it was happening too much, and what if they couldn’t talk Lao out of dying for Sin? Had they  _ ever _ talked Lao out of anything?

“Nova really isn’t coming back, is he?” Lao miserably asked that night.

“Amaya wouldn’t let him go with you anyway,” Crow pointed out, like it was his own point. “You’ve gotta tell me already, who else’re you taking?”

Lao shrugged. “I asked Candy, but he laughed and hasn’t spoken to me since. It’s pretty childish when we mightn’t ever see each other again.”

“He’s fifteen,” Crow pointed out. “If seventeen is too young to go on a death march…”

“At least call it a pilgrimage,” Lao sighed. “I asked Carmen too, and she did that thing where she just —” He stared levelly at Crow, face completely blank.

“Yeah, I know.”

“So it’s gonna be Luna,” Lao said. “Which is, well, she’s a really good fighter. I’m a little worried she’ll enjoy killing fiends too much.”

“She will,” Crow replied. “So, just me and her?”

Lao looked away. “Well… no…”He laughed anxiously. “You’re not going to be happy.”

Dread. Cold, spine-chilling dread Crow thought he’d become too numb to feel. “You didn’t…”

“I didn’t have much choice, Mother was very adamant they be people I know personally, and in case you haven’t noticed, she doesn’t let me out much,” Lao replied.

Crow collapsed on the windowsill. “Lao. You can’t… you can’t possibly spend the last months of your life enduring…  _ that _ .”

“Arez isn’t that bad any more,” Lao replied.

Crow winced at the very name he was terrified to hear.

“And, I mean, there’s a lot of uses for a songstress against fiends, really,” Lao mused. “And of course, Luna’s coming, so she’ll put a sword in his face if he’s too… well, you know.”

Crow still groaned.

“He’s been really quiet lately,” Lao said. “I think he’s pining.”

“For your death?”

“For  _ Nova _ .”

Just when he thought he couldn’t get more horrified. “Nova’s not into him like that.”

“I know,” Lao replied. “Still. I hope we find him. I wouldn’t… I want to speak to him again, before the end.”

So much for trying to find another way on the way.

Crow loathed the idea of spending the last few months of Lao’s life with Arez, and he didn’t like spending them with Luna either (bad influence!!) much either. 

Amaya threw a huge banquet on the street outside the temple/palace. With red-dyed carpets rolled out over the cobbled and crumbling streets, the stars out, and Bevelle’s guardians circling through the clouds. Lao didn’t look once at the stars. He was very pale, and being dressed in white didn’t help hide that. Still he smiled, he laughed, he listened to people, he forced excitement.

Crow sat moodily between Luna and Arez, stabbing food without eating it.

“Oh, come on,” Luna whispered (too loudly), “he’s not going to go through with it. Let’s just have fun while we can.”

Arez leant across Crow to hiss, “If you think he won’t go through with it, well, I always thought you were stupid anyway, so, no shock, but fuck off.”

“Yes, let’s take the word of someone Lao never speaks to unless he has to over his  _ actual  _ best friend,” Luna replied.

Arez sat back, huffing, throwing the pink-coloured tendrils of his hair over his shoulder. They really clashed with all the sapphire blue he was wearing, but then again, it wasn’t like Arez ever wore much.

Neither did Luna, for that matter. Crow had no idea how she could swing a sword like she did while exposing that much of her chest. Were invisible anti-gravity bras a thing?

It was going to be a rough trip.

At dawn the day Lao was to enter the Chamber of the Fayth, Crow woke up to Lao squirming into his bed, breathing erratic but not yet hyperventilating.

“I can do this, right?” he asked. “I can… I should…”

“If you're not sure, you shouldn't go through with it,” Crow replied.

“But… but, Mama, and, everyone, the party, they were all so happy, everyone wants the Calm so badly and I…”

“You don't have to live for everyone else just because you're a princess.”

Lao groaned, pulling a blanket over his head as though suffocating was a good alternative method of death.

“You can do it,” Crow reluctantly admitted. “I wish you couldn't. I wish you wouldn't. But you can, if it's what you really want.”

“It is,” Lao replied. “But I don't want to let anyone down by failing here.”

“You won't fail,” Crow replied. “That’s why I’m so scared. That's why Nova left. We know you won't fail, and that’s agony.”

Lao slowly dropped the blanket, sitting up. “That's the weirdest way to believe in someone,” he said.

“Yeah, well, I don’t want to be any more supportive of this than I have to be,” Crow replied. “Promise me you’ll consider every alternative we can find.”

“Of course I will,” Lao replied. “I don’t want to die for nothing.”

“And yet, here we are.”

“The Calm isn’t nothing,” Lao insisted. Crow knew it too, but the last Calm had been heavily tainted by the fact his mother had died for it. Nothing ever made it easier. Crow couldn’t understand how people could sleep easy in a reprieve paid for in blood.

But, one of Lao’s mothers had died for that Calm, too.

Lao hugged him tightly, forehead pressed firmly to Crow’s shoulder as he squeezed as tight as he could. “Thank you for doing this for me.”

It was entirely unfair for a seventeen-year-old to have moments of cuteness on par with how he’d been eleven years ago.

Lao waited as Crow got ready, sitting in his windowsill, staring down at the city. Admittedly, bondage pants covered in black leather belts was stupid when you were trying to hurry, but they were worth it. Especially with all the pockets magically expanded for Potions and weapons. Lao didn’t tease him for once: instead, he was completely silent as the sun rose.

Next they had to swing by Lao’s room, so he could change into his furisode and fix his hair. It wasn’t really a proper furisode; the white sleeves were detached, tied in place with purple thread, and gradiented into pink. The top was more of a scarf held strategically in place by the yellow obi, and the skirt was pleated and purple, decorated with flowers. It had, apparently, once belonged to Tiffany.

Despite his proper upbringing and a lot of warnings, Lao had a bad habit of changing in front of the windows. It probably didn’t matter, he always had shorts or leggings and a tank top on before, but it was still stupid and weird and probably because Lao usually got up while the stars were still out and was completely obsessed with looking at them. And after years of expecting trouble, of course that one day, probably the final day, Lao found trouble.

He paused in the middle of putting his earrings in, leant all the way out the window, and shouted, “Lichtman! What are you doing?”

“Oh, fucking oath,” Crow groaned. “Was that perv—”

Lao waved a hand at him to be quiet. “Stay there! Don’t move, I’m coming down.”

Crow grabbed Lao’s arm. “Do  _ not _ jump out the window.”

“Why do people keep thinking I’d do that?” Lao muttered. “If you’re coming, keep up, okay?”

And then he started running.

Funny thing about bondage pants and leather: not great for running. Crow hadn’t had a reason to run in years. His magic was strong enough to dispatch most fiends he’d encountered, and he had a careful image to maintain, thank you very much. But as always, Lao.

Stumbling and panting with great dignity, Crow made it to the walkway from the temple to Macalania Woods. The river lining the stone and carpet trickled loudly even as Lao stormed up to the warrior monk who’d so offended him, pointing at the pale brunet in handcuffs.

“Isn’t it too early to be arresting people?” Lao demanded.

“Princess, he’s a blasphemer,” Lichtman whined. “Kept saying he’s from Zanarkand.”

“Going  _ to _ Zanarkand, I’m sure,” Lao said, crossing his arms and rolling his eyes. “He’s my guardian.”

Crow stared at the brunet. He’d never seen the guy before in his life, but he looked Lao’s age, and worse, Lao’s type. Aggressively cut cheekbones, floppy hair, not what Lao called ‘too’ buff (usually while pointing at Crow, the shit), and apparently catching on fast enough to not look confused.

“I’ve not heard anything of this,” Lichtman said. “He wasn’t at the celebration yesterday.”

“We weren’t sure if he’d make it in time,” Lao replied. “Let him go. It’s almost time for me to enter the Chamber of the Fayth and he’ll have to stand guard.”

If Lichtman were a smarter man, he would’ve asked ‘What’s his name then, Princess?’ But luckily, Lichtman was a Leon fan. So painfully stupid he actually apologised profusely as he removed the handcuffs.

“That’s all right,” the brunet said. Smarmy, oh, great. “Sorry to have kept you waiting, Princess.”

Lao smiled so much he dimpled. “That’s okay. Come on, we have to get the others.”

As they walked away together, Lao very quietly asked, “What’s your name?”

“Kez. What’s going on?”

Lao shook his head. “My brother there, Crow, will explain. I have to go pray. Just keep your head down and keep watch, okay?”

“Fine,” Kez replied. He looked back at Crow. “Nice pants.”

Crow fought the urge to give a reaction.

They walked quickly back inside in silence. Crow tried not to wonder about the stray Lao had picked up, but it was hard not to. Crow had seen some fucked up clothes in his life, but asymmetrical leather overalls? Over a hooded jacket that was both  _ yellow _ and mid-rib length? What the actual fuck? It’d taken Crow  _ years _ to get enough leather belts for his #look, and here was some guy almost completely covered in it. He had to be beyond rich, yet someone that rich wouldn’t say they were from Zanarkand, or look around Bevelle like it was some magical wondrous place rather than the stupidest city in the history of Spira and the universe.

“Bro, Mother said she won’t be there to talk to us before we go in,” Lao said. “So hopefully there won’t be anyone, but…”

But of course, Leon.

Leon stood at one side of the staircase to the Cloister of Trials, Arez and Luna on the other (simultaneously huddled together and trying not to touch or look at each other). He stepped forward as they entered, arms spread as he purred, “Princess. What a radiant beauty you’ve become. Truly, Spira is blessed to have one of your poise as a Summoner.”

“I’m not a Summoner yet,” Lao replied.

“Oh, but I have full confidence in your abilities,” Leon replied. “Your mother’s clothes suit you wonderfully. I’m sure you will complete your pilgrimage where she failed.”

There was the psych-out.

“Hey, Old Man Yiffy, don’t you have some Ronso to drool over?” Crow demanded. “We don’t have time for this. Let us go in.”

Leon sneered, “So eager to see the Princess’ quest fulfilled, I see. Very well.”

And amazingly, Leon was actually too busy alternating between eye-yiffing Lao and Arez to even notice the stray. Well, not amazing, sickening, but an amazing new level of sickening that made Crow both queasy and suspicious as.

They stepped into the Cloisters, Lao dragging Kez along with a firm grip on the wrist. The ornate stone door closed behind them, leaving them in a passage of glowing glyphs.

“So, um, who the fuck’s this guy?” Luna asked.

“I don’t know,” Lao replied. “Lichtman was arresting him.” He looked up at Kez. “So, who the fuck are you?”

“My name’s Kez,” he replied, “and I have no idea where this is or what’s going on.”

“Are you really from Zanarkand?” Lao asked.

“Not if it’s a crime.”

Lao laughed. “No, you’re fine in here.”

“Ac-tu-ally, this is sacred ground and being blasphemous on the second sacredest of sacred grounds about the most sacred of sacredest of sacred grounds is probably not good,” Arez mansplained. “How’re you from a pile of rocks?”

“It wasn’t a pile of rocks when I left, it was a city,” Kez replied. “We were attacked by a — a thing. A monster in the water? Like a giant fiend, and… then I woke up in those weird-ass woods.”

“Hmm,” Lao said. “Well. Stick with us until we leave Bevelle, at least. That’ll keep you from being arrested or executed. Then you can do what you want.”

“Go home?” Kez suggested.

“Pile of rocks,” Arez muttered.

It was obvious Lao thought Kez was sick from Sin’s toxins, but Crow had never heard of Sin’s toxins making someone think they’d been in Zanarkand a thousand years ago when it was destroyed. Usually it just made them confused and violent.

They followed the patterns of glyphs on the walkway until they reached what had to be the Chamber. The room was circular, and from behind a tear-drop shaped descending door, a child could be heard singing the Hymn. Crow had heard the Fayth singing it many times, but never this close. It filled him with emotions until he felt like he might burst into tears.

“This is it,” Lao said softly.

He didn’t look at them as he walked towards the door. It slid upwards, and Lao disappeared inside. Moments later, the door closed, and the singing became louder.

This was it.

“Okay, so,” Kez said, looking at Crow, “what the hell is all this?”

Crow sat on the ground, dropping his foot on the eye of Yevon, and tried to figure out what to explain.


	2. hey @ god is fighting literally all these idiots legal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it's hard to describe literally anything from a video game's setting/designs in words. how word good? why would i know?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi i love antonia

At least Arez’s talent for mansplaining meant he took over explaining a thing, in complete detail, to the weird guy in too much leather and the longer Crow had to look at that stupid crop-topped hooded jacket that was  _ clearly _ designed for an eight-year-old, though someone ten years older could pull it off when he was a skinny git who didn’t even lift.

Crow ended up sitting against the wall, legs and arms crossed. It’d be more comfortable if the room weren’t circular and stone. With the Fayth singing endlessly, it was pretty easy to tune Arez and Kez out, and Luna had settled on the other side of the room looking equally as moody.

Nova had better be having better luck.

After three hours (there wasn’t any light to judge by so Crow counted in the back of his mind while the front of his mind continued to rant about Lao), the singing stopped.

“What’s that mean?” Kez asked.

Moment murderer.

Crow jumped to his feet, rolling his shoulders back as the door slid open. He held his breath, waiting, because, well, there was no way Lao would die  _ this _ early, right?

Right, he sighed to himself in relief, as Lao stumbled out. His hand shook as he clutched at the door-frame for support. Crow stepped forward, but Lao pulled himself up straight and started walking like that tremor wasn’t there.

“Thanks for waiting,” Lao said, casually, wiping a bead of sweat from his forehead. “I have to tell my mother, then we can go.”

“Can’t you take a nap first?” Luna asked. “Nobody’d expect you to be out this soon.”

“I’m fine,” Lao said.

“Martyrs are stupid,” Arez declared, storming from the Chamber with a flick of his hair.

“Your face is,” Lao called after him.

“You really are tired,” Luna said. “You could’ve at least gone for the hair.”

“The sooner we get out of Bevelle, the better,” Lao said.

Well. There was some truth to that, at least.

“Kez,” Lao said quietly, looking at the bad overalls nightmare hoodie jerk in question, “are you really from Zanarkand?”

“Yeah.”

“I guess it won’t do for you to stay here then,” Lao said. He looked away. “Uh. Can you fight?”

“Like, people?”

“Hopefully not. Fiends.”

“Yeah. I left my sword behind, though.”

Luna glared. “Swords are my thing in this party.”

Kez raised an eyebrow. “Lao didn’t ask me yet.”

Lao’s face actually went red, instantly, and he turned to Crow like he had no idea what was happening to him.

Crow was too exasperated to help.

“You don’t wanna go on the pilgrimage, it’s way dangerous,” Luna said. “We can take you to Luca. That’s the biggest city, if you somehow forgot.”

“I think he is from Zanarkand,” Lao said.

They were all doomed.

“How about instead of arguing we get out of here?” Crow suggested. “We’re probably bothering the Fayth. And like you said, Lao, the sooner we get out of Bevelle, the better.”

“Yeah,” Lao said, “okay.”

He totally thought he was subtle about gripping Crow’s left forearm for support the entire way back to the palace, even when Arez blatantly stared at him as they left the Chamber. Typical Lao.

Luna grabbed Kez’s arm, saying, “I’ll hide the heathen while you talk to your bitc— I mean, your mother,” as she was already dragging said heathen away.

“I guess Mama doesn’t like Luna anyway,” Lao murmured.

“Does she like anyone?” Arez asked.

Okay, Crow had been thinking it too, but he wasn’t enough of a fuck to say it without adding ‘other than you, Lao, of course’.

“She’s not Grand Maester  _ and _ Minathia for no reason,” Lao replied.

“Being Minathia is meaningless now.”

“Want me to test my new Aeon on you?”

Like a coward, Arez shut up.

They took the lift up to the Grand Maester’s balcony, even though Crow despised flying through the air on a slab of granite with flimsy railing around it. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust magic, it was that he didn’t trust  _ Yevon’s _ magic. Lao drew a deep breath before stepping off. They walked along the pathway, Lao smiling and waving at people calling to him from the one the next floor down (which was the ridiculous red-carpet one surrounded by water despite being almost on the roof of the Belleve Temple/Palace, and leading to Macalania Woods). When they reached the large ornate stone doors of Amaya’s stupid room, Lao drew in another deep breath, this time hesitating.

“Lao,” Arez said, “you’ve given her literally nothing to be upset about. You’re also  _ literally _ giving everything. So if she’s not as bad as I think she is, prove me wrong.”

A stirring pep talk from the sentient pile of shit.

Yet Lao nodded, face set in determination, as he pushed the doors open.

“Pixie,” Amaya said, looking up from her pile of scrolls. “I didn’t expect to see you before you left.”

“I wanted to say goodbye,” Lao replied.

“Pixie. You’re a Summoner now. You can’t be so selfish.” She stood up, walking around her desk towards him. “You’re doing a very good thing, but a very difficult thing. You need to give it everything, not be a child and try to make it everything you want it to be. You must do what Spira needs.”

Lao looked down, nodding. As he did, Amaya must’ve caught sight of his earring; she pulled back his hair, face settling into a furious scowl.

“Why are you wearing your mother’s earring?”

Lao jerked back, self-consciously clutching at it. “I thought…”

“Selfishly,” Amaya interrupted him. “You thought selfishly yet again and stole one of my last moumentos of Tiffany.”

Crow wanted to strangle her, see how she liked being suffocated.

“Leave it in your room on your way out,” Amaya said. “I’ll retrieve it later.”

“Yes, Mother.”

Amaya walked back around her desk, sitting down. She didn’t say anything else, just continued writing.

_ Fight her _ , Crow thought.  _ Tiffany left it all for you. Even if she didn’t, fucking fight her, Lao! _

But Lao turned and walked away. And there was nothing Crow could say to hurt Amaya like she deserved, because Amaya would never care what Crow thought of her.

That didn’t stop Arez from declaring, “You’re a fascist in literally everything, literally, a fascist parent even.”

Amaya replied, “Someone who has never had a parent willing to keep him shouldn’t pretend to understand a loving parent.”

Arez growled as he stormed out.

They ran to catch up to Lao. He was standing by the lift, fingers toying with the blue hair at the end of the earring.

Lao muttered, “So, okay, she is as bad as you say.”

And it was the most negative Crow had heard him say since taking up his Apprenticeship.

Lao took out the earring as they entered his room. Unsurprisingly, Luna and that fucking weirdo were there.

“What are you doing?” Luna asked. “Lao! Tiffany’s —”

“My mother told me not to steal it,” Lao replied. “I guess it would be too much effort to retrieve it at the end of my pilgrimage.”

Luna frowned, bit her lip, and stared out the window.

Lao shoved past them, heading to his dresser. As he did, he glanced briefly at Kez. “Did they tell you?”

“I don’t know,” Kez said.

“At the end of my pilgrimage, when I call the Final Aeon, after I defeat Sin, to save Spira, I’ll pay with my life,” Lao said. For the first time, he sounded angry about it. And for the first time, Kez looked caught off guard. “I hope joining us on my death march doesn’t upset you.”

“Actually,” Kez said, “when you sound that upset about it, it does.”

Lao snorted, “I’m not upset about my destiny.” He gently placing the earring on the dresser.

“Just take it,” Kez said. “To hell with your mother.”

Lao’s frown softened, yet his fingers were shaking.

“If you’re willing to give your life to save this, whatever this place is, maybe your mother should be willing to sacrifice something as material as an earring,” Kez said. “Or is this one of those religions that encourages greed?”

Lao actually laughed. The hell? “No. It’s not.”

He picked up the earring, put it back in and, before he could change his mind, started to run (or more like half-run, a bit beyond jogging, but still desperate to give the illusion of sophisticated Summoner control) for the path to Macalania Woods.

What the fuck. Was it always that simple to make Lao reconsider? Or did you have to be some pretty-boy who wasn’t family?

Luna ran after Lao, but the rest of them had more dignity. Okay, Crow kind of didn’t want to get there too quickly because nothing about Lao’s pilgrimage felt real yet, and it had technically already started. He was half-worried that first step into the woods would make it feel real, quarter worried they’d all die, and another quarter worried that it wouldn’t ever feel real and so he wouldn’t ever be able to access enough of his enormous brain to stop Lao from dying. But he could probably figure it out with a dissociative brain anyway.

After all, it was only a thousand year problem.

Lao and Luna waited for them to catch up at the edge of the woods. Luna was tossing her ridiculously large sword through the air, catching it, talking quietly, while Lao’s eyes darted around the guards as he pulled his hair conspicuously forward in an attempt to hide the ‘stolen’ earring.

“Hey, slowpokes,” Luna said. “You’re lucky Lao wanted to wait, or we’d be half-way to Guadosalam by now.”

“But the next nearest temple is —?”

“Old Man Yiffy’s,” Luna said.

Arez shut up, eyes widening with horror. Had he actually forgotten?

“I thought we’d go to Djose next,” Lao explained, “then Kilika, then Besaid, then head back to Macalania before going to the Calm Lands and Mt Gagazet and Zanarkand.”

“I guess there’s no way that actually makes sense,” Arez said. “If we could catch a boat to Besaid, but oh wait, Bevelle’s too important to let people  _ travel _ on boats from.”

“Yeah, because it’s so great to travel a long way on boat, on the ocean, where Sin is,” Crow said.

“Sin isn’t everywhere,” Arez muttered.

“D’ya know what a Catholic is,” Kez asked, “because —”

“Hey, funny attempt at a joke, but blasphemy is blasphemy,” Luna interrupted. “And I mean, I could probably take these guards if they happen to hear, but then who’s gonna get these weak chuckle-fucks through Macalania?”

“Excuse me,” Crow said.

Arez gasped. “That reminds me! You, whatever your name is!”

“Kez.”

Arez pulled out a hooked longsword that was sparkly and blue. Okay, not sparkly like fireworks, more like water, but still. He held it out to Kez. “This was my brother Eleos’ sword,” he said.

Kez stared at him.

“What?”

“Is your brother dead?” Kez asked. “Is this some sentimental heirloom?”

“Ew, no, I stole it from him,” Arez replied.

“Okay, good, I don’t wanna be a brother figure to you.”

“You aren’t  _ good _ enough to be anything to me,” Arez said, flicking his hair back. “But if you’re hanging around, you’d better be useful. Right, Lao?”

Lao said, “Anyone who’s nice to you for five seconds means everything to you.”

“Shut  _ up _ , you liar-killjoy, it has to be at least  _ one whole _ minute, actually.”

There was a pause, like they actually expected Nova to burst out of nowhere and say,  _ ‘At least Aré’s telling smaller lies.’ _

Kez took the sword. “Thanks,” he said.

“You do know how to use that, don’t you?” Crow asked.

“Yeah,” Kez replied. “But I don’t suppose I can get spare clothes, can I?”

“No, you’re funnier like that,” Crow replied.

“Absolutely,” Luna agreed. Before Lao could start looking too sympathetic she added, “Plus we’ve stolen enough today.”

Lao’s hand curled around the hair-hidden earring. “Sorry, Kez. Can we go?”

“Sure,” Kez said. “Just thought I’d ask.”

Kez hadn’t looked offended at the insults. Interesting. White boys were usually super insecure to any insult, unless it was to something they agreed was dumb. But why would you spend that much money to wear that much leather if you didn’t even like the stupid asymmetrical mess of an outfit? And why encourage Lao to steal from his mother (even if the earring was rightfully his and Tiffany would kick Amaya’s arse if she was around to know what Amaya was doing to her precious baby)?

The answer was the same thing: thief.

“Let’s go,” Lao said. “I want to get through as much of the woods as we can.”

Macalania Woods was one of those infectious places where it was hard not to feel relaxed. The dark blue trees twined and coiled together, until the sky was only visible when you looked straight up, its own blue insignificant compared to that of the trees, until it looked washed out enough to be white without clouds. Even then, the air was thick with thin, floating crystal shards. They followed the wind currents up above, and lined the coils of tree trunks to guide travellers along the correct path. The ground was rarely visible, and usually so mixed with tree roots and crystals it was impossible to tell it was dirt.

Crow had always loved Macalania. He’d spent a lot of time exploring it with Nova and Carmen, but he didn’t see the point in telling Lao the best routes to take. There were the odd strong fiends but there was nothing they couldn’t handle. Even the stray was useful, not stronger than Luna but faster, and able to pluck items from the pyreflies of the fiends without dying or being hurt. Not that speed really meant a lot when Arez could stop fiends in their tracks with his shrieking, but, you know, Arez Smythe, constant failure, and all.

Lao calmed down once they were deep in the woods. By that point they were approaching the spring. Crow thought he deserved to see that, so he walked ahead and led them to it. Lao actually gasped at the sight of the tree in the centre of the deep pool of water, taller than any building in Spira, with gleaming spheres of oranges, yellows, and reds within its branches. With the sun starting to set, the deep red of dusk made them sparkle more spectacularly than Crow’d ever seen before.

“Good, isn’t it,” Crow said, grinning.

Lao nodded, still speechless.

“Reckon we ought to call it a day?” Crow asked.

Lao nodded again.

“Finally,” Arez groaned, collapsing on his back on the ground. “I’m a star! I’m not used to this, this, pleb-tier labour!”

“Your magic’s pretty interesting,” Kez said.

Arez glared suspiciously. “So?”

Kez shrugged. “Just haven’t seen anything like it, is all. In Zanarkand, song magic is only used to make people mass-hallucinate emotions. Sometimes it’s for projecting whatever’s in the singer’s head too, I guess. Which is usually music videos.”

Arez sat up, glare intensifying. “That’s really stupid.”

“Yup,” Kez replied. “Probably more stupid I didn’t think it could be used any other way, huh?”

“ _ Yes _ .”

Crow said, “The water’s clean, but we shouldn’t sleep here. There’s always lots of,” he looked directly at Kez, “thieves.”

Kez didn’t look phased. Did that translate to remorseless?

“Thanks bro,” Lao declared, pulling his boots off and shoving them at him. “I’ll get water.”

“Lao,” Crow said, irritated, “I can make water with  _ magic _ .”

“Save your energy,” Lao said. “If we’re surrounded by it and it’s safe to drink, why not?”

And with that, Lao ran to the spring. He retied his skirt so it was above his knees before wading in, pulling a water jug from the subspace of his obi.

“He’s really something, isn’t he,” Kez said.

Arez jumped to his feet, hissing, “Don’t you even  _ think _ about it.”

“About how nice Lao is?”

Arez growled with frustration before storming off towards Lao.

“Obviously you’re meant to think about how nice Arez is,” Luna said.

Kez laughed. “Yeah, sure.”

Luna walked over to Lao, too. Crow took his chance.

“Are you a thief?”

Kez looked at him, impassive. “Did I steal your heart?”

“You don’t want to piss me off,” Crow said. “Just because Lao believes you doesn’t mean anyone else does.”

“I’m aware,” Kez replied. “Fine, yes, I have been a thief in the past.”

“So —”

“But that was in Zanarkand, and I only stole from people who deserved it,” Kez said. “Rich people who wouldn’t stop hoarding money and status symbols, for example. Or just jerks who didn’t show people the respect they deserve.”

“Like our leader, huh?”

“If that’s Lao’s mother then yeah, exactly like that,” Kez replied. “I stopped when I figured out better ways of seeking justice.”

And that sounded suspicious as fuck. “Like what?”

“Eh, y’know, politics.”

Okay, that would explain the suspicions. “I still don’t trust you.”

“Didn’t ask you to,” Kez replied. “But what reason would I have to fuck with people who’ve done nothing but help me?”

“I don’t know. Evil Sin-toxin-brain reasons.”

“Seriously,” Kez said, “I’m from Zanarkand.”

Crow shook his head.

“Isn’t it possible that with all the weird magic in the world, that could’ve happened?” Kez asked.

“I don’t know,” Crow replied. “I don’t see any reason to believe anything either way.”

“Fair enough.”

The whole level-headed and rational thing was pretty infuriating in how difficult to hate it was.

Crow led them around to a tucked-away little nook beside the spring. The trees were too thick for them to see the spring (excepting the towering central tree), but they could hear the water. Because the trees were so thickly bound, they pulled each other until they all pointed outward, giving them a clear view of the starry sky. Lao seemed to appreciate it when he lay down on the soft, mossy grass. As did Luna, who stretched out close to him. Arez climbed up the tree, sitting tensely above them on a long, flat branch tangle that couldn’t’ve been comfortable, but Yevon forbid Arez Smythe accidentally touch anyone.

As he set up a fire, Crow noticed a glitter of something vibrant green. It was too bright to be a crystal, and too green to be in Macalania. It was the same kind of green as an Al Bhed’s eyes, rich, vibrant, unique.

With as much acting ability as he could manage, Crow dragged his arm ‘accidentally’ across a charred log. “Ew. Hang on, I’m gonna go wash this off.”

“Bro,” Lao murmured sleepily, “don’t go alone.”

“It’s like five metres away, and who did most of the fiend-handling again, huh?” Crow replied.

“I did,” Luna replied.

“Just let him go,” Arez said. “Five metres isn’t even ten steps if you’re not  _ short _ .”

“Okay,” Lao yawned. “Bahamut can help me find you if I have to Send you, I guess.”

Was that the Aeon? Right, not the point. “You need to chill out, Princess.”

Lao only sighed, and it was easy to slip away after that. Even if he paused considering punching Kez in the face for so blatantly staring at Lao like he was pretty in his sleep. Luna could handle it. 

The light came from the opposite short of the spring, where all the thorny roots of the central tree spread across crystalised ground, and the fiends were more prominent. Crow recognised Nova immediately. He’d shaved his hair to its black roots, he was wearing one of those mesh-and-cotton Al Bhed body suits with the belts keeping every opening tightly cinched, there were goggles hanging around his neck, and even the ankles of his outfit were tucked into his heavy combat boots. So basically, he looked as Al Bhed as anyone ever, but Crow still recognised him immediately. True bromance confirmed.

“Yo,” Nova said. He gestured at the person by his side, who Crow had somehow missed. “This is Remy, he’s helpin’ me out.”

Crow didn’t regret looking down at the short, pale brunette with feathers braided in his hair. On all accounts, he should’ve. But he was instantly, well, Remy was less tacky than beautiful.

“Remy, this is my brother, Crow.”

Remy was beautiful in the most arrogant way possible. Crow knew plenty of people who knew they were attractive (himself included), but there was usually a degree of humility there. Remy radiated a deep-seated knowledge that yes, he was beautiful, yes, you wanted him, and no, you were not good enough.

Remy’s eyes dragged slowly over him, lingering on his arms for only a moment that was quickly followed by a small snort of derision.

In that instant, Crow understood the phrase ‘step on me’.

Nova brought him back to reality by asking, “Who’s the white guy?”

Crow shook his head as he dragged his eyes away from Remy (in a magnificent effort that showed he also lifted  _ self-control _ ). “That’s Arez Smythe, bro. Lao says he’s pining for you.”

Nova rolled his eyes. “Ya know who I mean.”

“Don’t have a clue,” Crow replied. “Says his name’s Kez, and says he’s from Zanarkand.”

“That must’ve gone over well with the Yevonites,” Remy smirked.

“That’s basically it, Lao saw him being arrested and —”

“-- decided he had to save a total stranger without knowing the context or consequences,” Nova concluded with a heavy sigh.

“Wow, your brother sounds really stupid,” Remy said.

Beauty truly can conceal a toxic bitch heart. “He’s not stupid, he’s just naive with a strong belief in the inherent goodness in everyone.”

“And a saving-people-thing,” Nova contributed. “Not stupid at all.”

“It sounds like the definition of stupid,” Remy said. “And what would Yevon exploit more than a stupid Summoner who actually believes in dying fighting Sin?”

Crow decided it was better if he ignored that. “We’re going to Guadosalam, then Djose, then from Luca to the islands.”

“Got it,” Nova replied. “Can’t say I’ll be there, but Remy will.”

Remy shrugged. “Not that I’ll tell a Yevonite anything. You probably won’t even notice me.”

“Bet I will,” Crow replied. “You’re not easy to miss.”

Remy laughed. “Oh, my god, you actually think that was smooth, don’t you?”

“He totally does,” Nova smirked.

“Shut up!”

“It’s almost a cute kind of inept,” Remy said. “Almost.”

“We’d better get back,” Nova said to Remy. “Be seeing ya, Mathis.”

“Nova, wait,” Crow said, stopping himself just before he touched Nova’s arm at all. “You’re… you’re safe, right?”

“Yeah,” Nova replied. “Turns out Al Bhed always look after their own.”

“Of course we do,” Remy scoffed. “I’ll never understand Yevonites. Except that you’re gross.”

Crow nodded to Nova. “I’ll keep Lao safe.”

“Keep yourself safe too.”

“‘Course.”

There was a long silence as they stared at each other, neither moving.

Remy cleared his throat.

“Yeah,” Nova said. “Gotta go.”

Crow hugged him.

“Yeah, right, okay,” Nova said, pulling away.

Remy handed him a small silver buckler. “Take this back. Say you were held up by a merchant.”

“Sure. You’re brilliant.”

“Mm-hmm.”

Nova reluctantly followed Remy away, around the spring, to between the trees. Crow watched until they were gone before he went in the opposite direction.

Lao lifted his head from the ground when Crow slipped back into the nook. “Bro. You’re back.”

“Yup,” Crow said, holding up the buckler. “Got cornered by a merchant, and I figured, well.” He tossed it to Kez.

“Oh, thanks,” Kez said.

Lao lay back down. “I’m glad you’re safe.”

“We’re gonna have to keep watch in shifts,” Crow declared. “I’m pretty awake, I’ll go first.”

“Second,” Luna volunteered, raising her arm.

“Whatever,” Arez yawned. “Be quiet, Lao’s asleep.”

And so he was.

Crow sat down near the entrance, holding his staff close. He wished he could’ve asked Nova more about Al Bhed life, or what they were planning, or even where they were, but… well, Remy was right. Yevonite didn’t get to know those things. They’d used them against the Al Bhed too much in the past.

It’d been a long day, and Crow quickly found his mind enjoyed slipping into a dull buzz as he just listened, to the sounds of the others sleeping, to the trickles of water, to the still forest, all to protect Lao so he could die at the right time.

Spira was so shithouse under all the pretty scenery. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry if the formatting got weird!!! gdocs does this weird thing where it sometimes adds extra spaces after italics and you can only see it here, on ao3. what a blessing?
> 
> anyway let's talk WEAPONS  
> -lao has [yuna's default staff](https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/finalfantasy/images/b/b5/FFX_Weapon_-_Staff_1.png/revision/latest?cb=20130421234604) because, of course he does.  
> -crow has [yuna's celestial weapon, nirvana](https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/finalfantasy/images/8/87/FFX_Weapon_-_Nirvana.png/revision/latest?cb=20130421234603), cos of birds & shit  
> -luna has [auron's default katana](https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/finalfantasy/images/3/3e/FFX_Weapon_-_Katana_1.png/revision/latest?cb=20130421234547) and obviously wants to use it A Lot  
> -arez is literally fighting with a microphone. what the fuck are you gonna do if something leaps at you, arez? just die? obviously!!!! the fyck!!!  
> -kez has the apparently iconic [brotherhood sword](https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/finalfantasy/images/9/9a/FFX_Weapon_-_Brotherhood.png/revision/latest?cb=20141129234557), aka the one wakka gives tidus, so what's that make you, aré?
> 
> crow's not only an overwhelmingly loving brother but an overwhelmingly loving gay and i hope everybody loves him even if he's very tired right now
> 
> also aeons will be summoned it just wasn't right for lao to have a big first summoning because unfortunately as we all know, amaya
> 
> also i rly love writing this don't @ me


	3. what's the deal with emotions i want out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our Team cross the thunder plains while emotions happen MUCH too much for crow's coolness factor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO BEST GIRL ANTONIA BIG TOASTY ANTOASTY

Crow woke up to obnoxiously bright morning light and whispered voices occasionally punctured by barely stifled giggles. His mind was rarely groggy, so he immediately recognised the giggles: Lao.

Carefully opening his eyes only a fraction, Crow could make out Lao, knees hugged to his chest, head rested atop, looking at Kez, who was sitting sprawled but leaning close when Lao started to speak.

Definitely eavesdropping time, Crow decided, as he closed his eyes again.

“— it’s more like, if we use machina, we’ll learn to depend on them again. And that’s the sin: laziness when we’re fully capable of doing it ourselves.”

“I dunno,” Kez said. “Sounds like the political cartoons old people in Zanarkand would draw about the Internet and mobile phones.”

“I have no idea what half the words you just said mean.”

“List of dead technology then, I guess,” he said. “Don’t you use any of it, though? Like, a phone. That’s making it so you can call anyone anywhere in the world, no matter how far it is, that’s not… laziness?”

“We use spheres,” Lao said. “Lots of spheres.”

“So, magic, huh?”

“Mostly. We only use machina that work from magic,” Lao replied. “So they’re harnessing our own energy to work.”

“What if someone can’t give enough energy? Or use magic?”

“Someone else will help.”

“Does that really work?”

“I think so,” Lao said. “But my mother has kept me sheltered.”

Holy shit, he knew.

“Are you doing this to get away from her, then?” Kez asked.

“No,” Lao replied. “I could do it another way.”

“Yeah, I was gonna say.”

“I know what everyone thinks,” Lao sighed. “I’m not doing this for her, though.”

“Sounds like a lot to do for anyone.”

“My other mother was a Summoner before me,” Lao said. “So was Crow’s.”

“Oh, you mean you’re not biologically related?”

“Shut up, you obviously knew that.” Lao’s voice got quieter as he said, “My mother was made to quit. She went with Crow’s mum Izbuja as a guardian. And then, after, my other mother, she said it had to be Tiffany who’d defeated Sin.” He paused. “Until the Calm only lasted six months. Then she said it was Izbuja.”

“What the fuck.”

Lao’s voice started shaking with rage so pronounced, Crow knew it had to be coursing through his entire body. “Can you even imagine having just lost your mother and having the ruler of your country and species saying her life was worth that little?”

“No.”

“I care about Amaya because I feel like I don’t have a choice, but I hate her more than anything,” Lao said. “And yet, people think I’m doing this for her.”

“Why are you doing it?”

Lao sighed. “Lots of reasons.”

He didn’t elaborate.

“Okay, I believe you,” Kez said. He let the moment hang until Lao’s tension started to ease. “Tell me more about chocobos?”

Lao’s eyes lit up, and he giggled at himself. Probably realising how easy that had been. “Okay, we probably won’t see any for a while, but —”

Enough was enough. Crow shifted as though waking up and yawned. As he sat up, twisting to look at Lao, he saw Lao jump, turn red, and slide slightly away from Kez.

Yevon. Fucking. Dammit.

“Morning,” Kez said casually.

“Yes it is, well spotted,” Crow said. “Lao, we’d better go soon if we want to cross the Thunder Plains today.”

“You’re the one who slept in,” Lao replied. “I’m all ready to go.”

Crow kicked Arez awake. It seemed like the best use of his frustration.

As they gathered their things and started on their way (ignoring Arez’s shouts of abuse all the while), Luna started interrogating Kez again.

“What’s the national dish of Zanarkand? Is Zanarkand a city or a country? Who told you your hair looks good like that, can I fix it for you, I’m one of the unfortunate people who has to look at you after all? Sound good? Also, what’s your job?”

And Crow was listening more closely than he should’ve. Part of that was Kez’s mumbling but also, literally why did he care? It wasn’t until Kez clearly lied about being the ‘star player of the Zanarkand Abes’ and Luna ignored the sarcasm that he thought, ‘Got him’. Luna seemed to think it, too — she glanced to Crow with a smirk, then said lightly, “Really? I never would’ve guessed. That’s interesting.”

Crow wondered if he should wait for Luna’s plan, or just start pressuring Kez to show them his sweet blitz moves, bro.

By this point they’d reached the edge of Macalania and were staring out at the eternal gloom of the Thunder Plains. They were so named because, well… it was a muddy, eternally wet plain where the thunder only ever stopped for the occasional piss-down of rain. Being a sensible and intelligent person with better things to do, Crow always avoided them. But Nova was known to sit at the edge of Macalania, staring unflinching at the endless storm, because Nova was an emo piece of shit.

“Do you think it’s going to rain?” Lao asked, staring up at the clouds like they meant anything.

“It doesn’t thunder or lightning while it’s raining,” Arez sighed. “Have you ever even read a book?”

Lao asked, “What’s a book?”

Normally Crow was all for fucking with Arez Smythe, but they were standing at the edge of a lightning pit. “Let’s just get this over with.”

Lao smiled at him with amusement. “Why rush?”

Right on cue, the plain was illuminated by lightning striking the ground.

Unflinching, Lao said, “It’s so pretty.”

As Crow glared at him, Lao’s smile widened. He turned away, started to walk. The others immediately followed. But Crow was momentarily paralysed, emotions crashing over him that he knew he must ignore.

It had been a long time since Lao smiled at him with pure mischief. He didn’t need to count and categorise the smiles, though, because it wouldn’t matter. Lao wouldn’t die. Crow would receive Lao’s bullshit for a lifetime to come. He had to.

With that weight trying to crush him, the Thunder Plains didn’t seem so bad. The lightning was constantly blinding and always seemed to miss the dozen or so scattered lightning rod towers, the mud was slippery and oozing through holes he hadn’t realised were in his shoes, the constant cranky static in the air may irreparably damage all their hair (not, in many cases, a tragedy), the thunder wouldn’t shut up, and it all kept him miserable in the present rather than miserable in a future he wouldn’t allow to happen.

Yevon bless the Thunder Plains, giver of misery most potent.

And oh, the fiends! The twisted remains of tortured souls who hadn’t survived the Plain. They just wanted everybody else to be too incompetent to dodge lightning, didn’t they? Half the time they were hanging under the lightning rods, the other half they were standing in the middle of the road, waiting. Nothing at all like the wild beast behaviour of those in Macalania.

Thank Yevon for keeping all the Summoners locked in temples training to defeat Sin so they never got to just go out and Send some randos to the Farplane.

Fiends tended to attack in groups. They weren’t necessarily groups of similar types of fiends, but they clearly looked out for each other in some weird way people who weren’t dead couldn’t understand. Crow hadn’t noticed until Nova pointed it out, but you could often get through the entire of Macalania without fighting more than a couple of fiends if you walked slowly and didn’t startle any of them.

But of course Lao looked pitying at every fiend they saw, wanted to fight them all, and was super fast to twirl his staff to direct their pyreflies to the Farplane. Sometimes he’d start Sending when they were still fighting.

It didn’t take long for that to turn disastrous.

Four fiends came at them at once. Crow pretty quickly took down a flying lightning-monkey with a water spell, but he couldn’t really do anything against a bunch of sentient rocks. Neither could Arez (rocks didn’t have ears), the stupid tag-along was too weak to do much damage, so it was all on Luna while the rest of them struggled to hit the stupid rocks anyway.

And Lao just had to decide, ‘This seems like a good time to do a Sending.’

Which of course drew the attention of other fiends.

Which of course made a wolf decide ‘This seems like a good time to eat a Summoner.’

Crow could see it all happening, but could not process it. It happened so quickly, but so matter-of-factly. It took too long to prepare a spell, and the wolf was diving right for Lao’s throat, and there was nothing he could do, any of them, they were cornered by the stupid fucking rocks, and he had a fraction of a second of complete certainty, ‘This is how it ends.’

Until a knife embedded in the wolf’s skull.

Crow blasted one of the rocks with fire. Luna stabbed another in the face before turning to the third. Crow let her handle it, turning to Lao. That fucking freak was already there.

“Are you okay?” Kez asked, pulling out the knife.

“Yeah,” Lao said. “Thanks, I’m — where’d you get that?”

“Zanarkand’s not exactly safe,” Kez replied. “Maybe you shouldn’t do that, thing, whatever it is, while we’re still fighting?”

“I have to,” Lao said. “What if I don’t get the chance? Those are real people who need help.”

Same old. And if challenged on it, Lao would start shrilly shouting about how he totally wasn't judging anybody but he couldn't turn his back on anyone who needed his help just because  _ somebody else  _ didn't think he had it in him to help every rando and fiend thrown in his path.

“Okay,” Kez said, “but they're also literally monsters who won't hesitate to kill any of us, so maybe that should be the priority if you don't want any of us dying.”

Lao started with, “I would rather die helping people than live ignoring those who need help.”

Arez groaned loudly.

“Look, I know you martyrs think dying for other people is the best thing in the world, but it's really not,” Kez said. “Just because your mother asked you to die doesn't mean any of us signed up for the same.”

Maybe Crow actually didn’t have anything to worry about. Lao looked supremely pissed off. And if Arez fucking Smythe had been good for anything, it was the painful lesson of not dating people you argue with because of what straight people say,  _ Lao _ .

“You’re trying to convince me helping people is a bad thing,” Lao said, “while I’m in the middle of helping you.”

“Is that what I said? Because I thought I was talking specifically about literal monsters that want to kill us out of spite,” Kez said. “Do people in Spira not know that part of what fiends are, or something?”

Ever helpful, Arez fucking Smythe decided to contribute, “No, Lao’s just stupid.”

Lao simply punched Arez.

“Bro,” Lao said, turning to Crow. “I want a break.”

He then stormed past them all and towards the Al Bhed travel agency.

“Damn Blitzy, you really dunno when to shut up, huh?” Luna said.

Kez shrugged, pocketing the knife.

Crow went after Lao. The travel agency was a circular hut, draped in dripping banners. He could read the Al Bhed declaring ‘IF YOU’RE AL BHED YOU CAN STAY FOR FREE, IF YOU’RE INTO YEVON YOU MUST PAY TRIPLE’, but he was pretty sure Lao couldn’t. Inside was heavily decorated with elaborately woven carpets, old books (the only non-Al Bhed title being ‘The Yevon Delusion’), and leaning on the counter watching him with a smirk, Remy.

Had the ground just vanished from under his feet?

“You, I, uh... ” Why was he trying to speak when Remy was flicking back his braids with such a poised hand?

“A Summoner just rented a room, are you their Guardian?” Remy asked, like they were strangers. Which they were, really. Remy gestured to the door beside the counter. “Do you want to go check on them?”

Crow replied, “I’d rather check you out.”

Predictably, Remy laughed at him. “You’ve been doing that since you walked in.”

“Why would I stop?”

Remy raised his eyebrows. “If I asked you to?”

Crow immediately looked away. “Sorry.”

Remy laughed again. “I’ll allow it.” He leant closer and softly said, “But only if you promise to do more than just look.”

Holy. Shit.

And then Arez fucking Smythe walked in.

“Hey, how come you charge three times as much for Yevonites?” he asked, completely oblivious to everything he’d just ruined, as always.

In Al Bhed, Remy replied, “What do you think, you adorable idiot?”

Arez thought about it. Like actually had to take time and think. “I guess they do hoard all the money. And land. And property.”

“Good start,” Remy said. 

“Why the hell do you know Al Bhed?” Crow asked.

Arez dismissively replied, “Nova taught me. And it’s blasphemy, so it’s good.”

Remy smiled. “Tell you what, cutie, I’ll only make it twice as much for you.”

“I’m not staying, I’m getting a Summoner and dragging him out,” Arez replied. He gestured about an inch shorter than himself. “Little blonde thing. Tragic amounts of purple. Constant look of miserable anger. Seen him?”

“Yeah, he offered me twice as much money not to let you in,” Remy replied. He gestured at Crow. “This one’s allowed in, though.”

Arez looked at him expectantly. “What’re you waiting for, huh?”

With a frustrated sigh, Crow gave in. He walked down the corridor (which was too blue) to a redwood door. He knocked. Lao opened the door very quickly. Maybe he’d been waiting. Was Crow really that predictable?

It was, at least, a surprisingly nice room. Six four poster beds followed the room’s curve, all with faintly blue silk curtains. Lao was sitting in a chair at a vanity, frowning at his reflection.

“How long do you want to stay?” Crow asked.

Lao shrugged.

“You can’t sulk forever.”

Lao sighed, “I wasn’t planning on it. I just —” 

He looked like Crow would interrupt, but Crow had nothing to say.

“I don’t know,” Lao groaned. “I don’t know how to fight. I don’t know when I’m meant to Send and when I’m not. I don’t know when I’m meant to care and when I’m not. I just don’t know.”

“What do you think I can tell you?” Crow asked. “I can teach you Black Magic now Amaya’s not around to call it ‘tainting’.”

“Yeah,” Lao sighed. “Thanks.”

“That’s not gonna help if we’re all distracted and a fast fiend is biting at your throat though,” Crow said. “I was scared.”

“I knew it’d be fine,” Lao mumbled. “I knew none of you’d let anything happen to me.”

“I don’t want to let anything happen to you, but I couldn’t do anything about that,” Crow said. “I can’t always — I want to, but I can’t…”

Lao looked at him like he was seeing him for the first time.

“I’m sorry,” Lao said. “I’ll be more careful.”

It felt like setting down weights are a long workout. “Thanks.”

Lao buried his face in his hands. “Am I really making you, I don’t want, I don’t wanna force anyone to do anything, but —”

“We could all say no if we wanted to,” Crow said. Even though he felt like saying no was not at all an option. “Don’t let an angry rando get to you.”

“Is he wrong, though?” Lao asked. “Sometimes — sometimes I’m scared by how much I want to give.”

Didn’t it just figure that the pretty boy once again got through to Lao.

“I wouldn’t worry too much,” Crow said. “You’re fine at being selfish when you want to be.”

Lao hit him.

“You just need to remember not to literally die,” Crow said. “You need to promise me you’ll stop if we can’t find another way.”

“I already promised that,” Lao said, looking wearily at him. “Can't you trust me?”

“That’s not the problem? I’m worried about what you’ll do when you don’t think about yourself.”

“But Kez said I wasn’t thinking about you guys.” Of course that was the part Lao was offended by. “I only thought, the sooner I Send them, the less likely they were to call more fiends…” 

The little idiot. Crow had to hug him. “What does the opinion of some guy who’s known you for two days matter?”

“I know,” Lao mumbled. “I’m being so stupid. But…” 

And this was the part where Lao blushingly admitted to a crush.

“…but the Fayth said he’s really from Zanarkand, and I need him.”

Crow blinked. “You what?”

“Never mind,” Lao sighed. “I don’t know anything more than that yet.”

Crow pulled away slowly. Lao’s face wasn’t just serious; it was anxious. He at least believed he was telling the truth, and… What would Crow know about what the Fayth said? How could he possibly entertain the thought that Lao didn’t know exactly what he was talking about?

“Well,” he said, “maybe the next one can tell you more.”

“That’s what I’m hoping,” Lao replied. “Kez doesn’t seem to know — well, anything at all, actually.”

Crow reluctantly pointed out, “You’re being mean because you’re sulking.”

“I know,” Lao said, “let me have this.”

Hugging him again, Crow thought about how lost he’d be without this stupid little brat (who was actually constantly doing fine) to worry about.

“You can sleep,” Crow said. “We’ll stay as long as you want.”

Lao shook his head. “I’m ready.”

The moment they stepped into the corridor, they ran into Kez. He was wide-eyed, Lao stood too straight and defiant, they both said “I’m sorry” at the same time then started laughing, and Crow realised the crisis had only been averted.

“Seriously, I am,” Kez said. “That was unfair, I don’t know how different things are here. I dunno if anything means the same thing here as it does back home.”

“It’s okay,” Lao said. “It’s, my first time facing fiends, and I —”

“Really? I’d kinda assumed, from how many are around, and, how calm you are…”

Oh, that was just blatant buttering up. Lao had never been genuinely calm a day in his life.

“I told you I was sheltered,” Lao said. “You didn’t tell any of us you could throw daggers.”

“’Cos I can’t, it’s a magic knife,” Kez replied. “Only works for one throw. I was saving it.”

Crow watched Lao, wondering if how blatantly suspicious that was connected. If it did, Lao was too good at smiling sweetly for it to show. When Lao bowed his head slightly, cheeks red and mumbled, “Thanks for using it to save me,” Crow knew it actually hadn’t. Lao was still blinded by the floppy hair and cheekbones.

How could someone be so frustratingly brilliant and overwhelmingly naive at the same time?

They found Luna and Remy whispering back and forth while Arez watched with a hanging jaw. He looked less scandalised and more too stupid to process what was being said.  _ When _ had Nova taught him Al Bhed? Nova hadn’t even taught  _ Crow _ . The fuck, man.

“Thank you for the room,” Lao said to Remy, “we’re ready to go now.”

“That was fast,” Remy drawled, “I didn’t know Summoners were into a li’l afternoon delight.”

Lao blinked. “A what?”

“Nothing,” Crow said, shoving him towards the door. “Gimme your money, I’ll pay the nice man.”

“Aw, and we were just getting to the good stuff,” Luna sighed. To Remy she said, “You. When I’m done with this noise I’m so sending you all my good ex-clothes, if you send me yours.”

“I’m not sure they’ll fit,” Remy said, “but we’ll see.” He looked at Crow as he said, “I get the feeling our paths will cross again.”

“Cool, that’s totally not ominous,” Luna said. “Laters.”

Crow deliberately went through a slow count of gil, laying each coin one by one on the counter, until the others were all outside.

“Nice friends you’ve got there Hotfire,” Remy said sinisterly.

“Literally none of them are my friend,” Crow replied. “Are we going to keep running into you in travel agencies?”

Remy shrugged, sliding the coins into his hand. “Why don’t you wait and see?”

“I don’t want to wait to see you,” Crow said.

Remy laughed. “We’ve both got work to do, mate.”

“Can’t a man like looking at another man anyway?”

“I dunno, ask Yevon,” Remy replied. “Thanks for coming, valued customer.”

Crow couldn’t help looking back as he left. Remy wasn’t looking at him; he was putting the coins in some machina. He looked relaxed, confident, fully in charge, and Crow wasn’t sure if he’d somehow catch those traits by sleeping with Remy but sure wanted to try.

But Remy was right.

They continued through the Thunder Plains at a faster pace. The next time a group of fiends attached, Lao lifted his staff to the sky and a giant muscular dragon landed in front of him, blasting them all with dark magic.

Kinda typical, in its own horrifying thighs-too-cut way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> was the wolf being killed subtle

**Author's Note:**

> idk how long this is going to be but i like it so i will continue to do my best
> 
> now let's talk outfits, because FF outfits are hell to describe.  
> -lao is literally just wearing yuna's outfit but less of a bra under the scarf-top and more of a, well, tank top  
> -crow's is pretty clear i feel, as is the lulu-spiration  
> -nova is all [noctis](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/ec/0d/3d/ec0d3d330fb38b9a4177996b1173aa7f.png) (i know it doesn't make sense)  
> -arez's is [lenne](https://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/finalfantasy/images/0/04/Lenne.png/revision/latest?cb=20140809150449) except, y'know, none of those ugly earrings and shorts instead of a skirt because it's arez  
> -i was imagining luna wearing rikku's warrior outfit in ffx2 but then i looked at it again and my eyes hurt from how ugly so just, i don't know, but her cleavage is a powerful weapon as always  
> -yes kez is just wearing tidus' clothes, and it's awful  
> -old man yiffy is not dressed like seymour i'm not a monster just picture some generic ugly robes and that'll do  
> -i am so sorry for that comment about old man yiffy and the ronso i feel awful about it but i have to be true to the shits these characters are as people i'm so sorry ronso you have done literally nothing to deserve this
> 
> and i hope this was an interesting & fun little teaser!!! it was fun to write. i haven't written crow's pov since like 2011 and it was never in high-demand so this was good for me


End file.
